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INTRODUCTION TO THE DIVERSION OF THE LITTLE ONE It was a proverb established after those of an antique usage that whoso seeketh what he should
not findeth what he would not; and clear thing it is that the ape, for drawing on boots, was
trapped by the foot. This also befell a beggarly handmaid, who, never having worn shoes to her
feet, must needs wear a crown on her head; but, as all wrongs meet their requital, and anon
comes one that compensates for each and every, at last, having by wicked ways usurped what
belonged to others, she was caught at the wheel, even as says the by-word, 'The higher the
height, the lower the lapse': and this shall be shown after the fashion that follows. It is said that once upon a time there was a king of the Bushy Valley that had a daughter named
Zoza, and she, like another Zoroaster or Anacretus,[Note: Heraclitus.] was never seen to smile.
The afflicted father, having none other life and spirit than this his only daughter, left nothing
undone to lighten her melancholy. The better to provoke from her a laugh, he summoned now
drolls who walk upon mace heads, and then fellows who jump through circles, and anon boxers,
and rivals of Master Roger the juggler, and workers of legerdemain, and anon fellows strong as
Hercules, and now the dancing dog and the leaping old man, and then the ass that drinks from a
tumbler and the bitch Lucia Conazza [Note: A Neapolitan dame.]: briefly, now one thing, and
then another. But 'twas all lost time, for neither the remedy of Master Grillo [Note: A noted
medico of the day.], nor the herb sardonion, nor a dig in the diaphragm would make her smile in
the least. At length the unfortunate father, wishing to make a last attempt and not knowing what else to do,
gave orders to build a great fountain of oil fronting the palace gate, with design by so doing that
the folk who crowded like ants passing to and fro that way should be obliged, so as not to soil
their clothes, to skip like crickets, and buck-jump like goats, and scurry like hares, pushing and
knocking one against another: thus hoping that somewhat might occur which would make his
daughter laugh. So this fountain being built, as Zoza was standing at her lattice window, looking sour as vinegar,
she saw an ancient woman coming to the fountain, and soaking up the oil with a sponge, filling
therewith an earthen ewer she had brought with her; and whilst so doing, a certain court page
threw a stone so true to an hair that he hit the ewer and broke it to bits. Hereat the old woman,
who was by no means hairy of tongue, nor held herself from speaking her mind, turned to the
page, and thus began to say: 'Ah, kindchen, scatter-brains, piss-a-bed, goat-dancer, petticoat-catcher, hangman's rope, mongrel mule, spindle-shanks, whereat if ever the fleas cough, go
where a palsy catch thee; and may thy mammy hear the ill news! Never mayest thou see the first
of May! May a Catalan lance thrust thee through! Mayest thou be touched with the rope and
never lose a drop of blood! A thousand miseries reach thee, with the rest to boot; and, in short,
may the wind blow away thy sail, so that the seed may be lost, thou knave, pimp, son of a
whore!' The lad, who had little beard and less discretion, hearing this flow of abuse, repaid her with the
same coin, saying, 'Wilt thou not hold thy tongue, devil's grandam, bull's-vomit, children-smotherer, turd-clout, farting crone?' The old woman, hearing all the news of her household thus
cried aloud, waxed so wroth that, losing all patience, she raised the curtain of her clothes, and
showed a truly rural scene, whereof Silvio[Note: Dialectic, Sirvio: a personage in some pastoral,
perhaps the pastor.] might have said, 'Go, wake the eyes with the horn.' When this spectacle was
beheld by Zoza, she fell backwards, laughing so much that she had well-nigh fainted. Hereupon
the old woman became even more furious, and turning a fierce look upon Zoza, cried, 'Go! and
mayest thou never see the bed of an husband, unless thou take the Prince of Campo Rotundo!'.
Zoza, who heard these words, summoned the crone and perforce would learn if she had meant to
lay a curse upon her, or only to abuse her; and the other answered, 'Now thou must know that the
prince I have named is a wonderful creature, Thaddeus highs, who, having been cursed by a fairy,
came to the last picture of life, and was laid in a tomb outside the city walls, and upon his
tombstone an inscription is graven: "Whosoever of womankind will in three days fill with tears
an earthen vessel which hangs upon an hook, she will bring him to life and strength, and will take
him to husband." But as it is impossible for two human eyes to run so much with weeping as to
fill an earthen vessel which holds half a flagon, save, as I have heard recounted, it were a certain
Jinniyah who became at Rome a fountain of tears, I, because I saw myself derided, have given
you this curse, which I pray Heaven may fall upon you in revenge for the injury done me.' And
thus saying, the old woman ran down the steps and went her way, being afeard that something
might happen to her. Meanwhile the princess pondered over the words of the old woman, and meditated, and doubted,
and feared, and at length drew from them that passion which blindeth our judgment and
darkeneth the mind; and she determined to fly from her father's house, and taking with her many
thousand crowns and jewels, left the palace, and fared along until she reached the castle of a
fairy, to whom she told her story. The fairy, taking compassion of such a beautiful young maiden,
and desiring to help her on account of her youth and her great love to an unknown being, gave
her a letter of recommendation to her own sister, who was also a fairy; and taking kindly leave of
her, presented her with a walnut, saying, 'Take this, O my daughter, and keep it by thee, but open
it not save in time of great stress.' The princess took the gift and the letter, and proceeding on her
journey, ceased not wayfaring until she arrived at the castle of the second fairy, who also
received her graciously, and well entreated her. And on the next morning, before taking leave, the
fairy gave her a letter for another sister of hers, and presented to her a chesnut, with the same
advice which had been given to her before. She fared on until she reached the castle of the third
fairy, who also welcomed her, and entreated her kindly. The following morning, before her
departure, the fairy presented her with an hazel-nut and the same injunctions as the other sisters. Having received these things, Zoza fared on through cities and villages, wilds and words, passing
seas and rivers, until after seven years she arrived, tired and worn by so much wayfaring, at
Campo Rotundo, where, before entering the city, she perceived a mausoleum of marble at the
foot of a fountain where a porphyry criminal wept tears of crystal: and hung thereon was the
earthenware flagon.Taking the vessel down, and putting it before her, she shed two rivulets of
tears rivalling the fountain, never lifting her head from its mouth, so that at the end of two days
the tears had filled it to the neck. and there remained only two inches more. But, wearied by so
much stress and trouble, she was taken by a deep sleep, so that she lay perforce under a tent close
by for well-nigh two hours. In the meantime a certain slave, Cricket-legs highs, who came often
to that fountain to fill an hogshead, and who knew well the matter of the inscription, which was
spoken of everywhere, hid herself when she beheld Zoza weeping, awaiting that the earthen
flagon should be nearly full, hoping by some wile to win the remainder to herself, and thus leave
the princess with a handful of flies. And as she beheld her asleep, she thought the time had come
for her advantage, and dexterously taking the earthen juglet, and putting her eye upon its mouth,
filled it to the brim in a short time. Hardly was it full when the prince, awaking as from heavy
sleep, arose from the marble sarcophagus, and threw his arms around that mass of black flesh and
leading her to his palace, with feasts, and joyance, and revelry took her to wife. But no sooner did
Zoza awake to find the grave open, and the juglet gone, and with it all her hopes and joys, than
she came near to unpacking the bales of her soul at the custom-house of death. At last, seeing
that for this evil there was no remedy, and that she could blame nought but her own eyes which
had watched so ill that which held her desire, she arose, and fared on, and entered the city. And
when she heard of the bridal feasts of the prince and of the fine wife he had taken to himself, she
imagined how the misfortune had come to pass, and said to herself, sighing, 'Alas! two black
things have crushed me to the earth: black sleep and a black slave.' Then, desiring to struggle
against death, from which every kind of animal trieth to defend itself, Zoza took a fine house
fronting the prince's palace, from within which she could not behold the idol of her heart, but
could at least look upon the walls of the temple which held him for whom she longed with
excessive longing. Herewhile Zoza was seen one day of the days by Thaddeus, who had been flying until then like a
moth around that black, hideous slave. When he beheld her, he became as an eagle, and held ever
present in mind the beauty and comeliness of Zoza, even as it is one of the privileges of nature to
be taken by a beauteous form and face. The slave failed not to perceive of what had taken place
in the prince's mind, and she was wroth with exceeding wrath, and being with child by
Thaddeus, threatened him, saying thus: 'If thou wilt not close the window, I will punish my belly
and murder little George.' The prince, who loved his race, trembled like a leaf, and liked not to
anger his wife, and therefore shut himself in, although it seemed to him he had taken the life out
of his body in depriving himself of the sight of Zoza's beauty. The princess, perceiving herself
deprived of the only means of beholding Thaddeus, and having lost every hope, not knowing
what to do in this her time of need, bethought herself of the three gifts of the fairies, and cracking
the walnut, out flew a handsome bird, the handsomest that had ever been seen in the world. The
bird began to sing, and trill, and quaver at the window as no other bird had done before, and
having been seen and heard by the slave, she could not rest without it, and so, calling the prince,
said to him, 'If thou wilt not get for me that bird that sings so well, I will punish my belly and
murder little George.' Thaddeus, who had let himself be ridden by her, sent at once to the
princess to ask if she would sell it. Zoza made answer that she was not a seller of birds, but if he
would accept it as a gift, she would present it to him. The prince, desiring to please his wife on
account of the child she would bring to light, accepted the offer; but about four days after, Zoza
opened the chesnut, and out of it stalked a fowl with twelve chicks of gold, which were seen by
the slave upon the same window-sill, who at once longed to have them, and sending for the
prince, pointed to them, saying, 'If thou bring me not that fowl and chicks, I will punish my belly
and murder little George'; and Thaddeus, who allowed this bitch to pull him by the nose, sent
again to the princess, offering her whatever she chose for such a priceless fowl, and he received
the same answer as before: that he might have it as a gift, but to ask of buying it would be but
lost time. And as he could not, and dared not, refuse, necessity had the best of his discretion; and
he was humbled by the generosity of a woman, their liberality being very scarce, as they are
never spoiled, not even by owning all the ores of India. But having passed other four days, Zoza
opened the hazel-nut, from which came forth a doll, who was spinning gold, a most marvellous
thing.No sooner was she put at the same window than the slave saw her, and sending for the
prince, said to him, 'If thou bring me not that doll, I will punish my belly and murder little
George'; and Thaddeus, who let his wife swing him about as yarn-blades, by whom he was
ridden at her pleasure and crushed by her pride, not having courage to send for the third time to
the king's daughter for the doll, thought it best to go himself, remembering the old saws, 'There
is no better messenger than thyself,' and 'Who wanteth goeth, and who wanteth not sendeth,' and
'Who will eat fish must take it by the tail,' and beseeching her to forgive his boldness for
begging these things because of the whims of a woman great with child, asked for the doll. Zoza,
who was nigh a-fainting because of the cause of all her travail, hardened her heart, and allowed
him to pray and beseech of her the gift of the doll, so as to have her lord near her and hear his
voice, and to enjoy the light of his presence a little longer--he who had been stolen from her by
an hideous slave. At last she gave him the doll, as she had done all the other things; but before
she handed it to him, she begged the doll to make the slave long to hear tales and stories.
Thaddeus, who beheld the doll in his hand without spending a single crown, felt crushed by so
much kindness, and he offered Zoza his kingdom and his life in exchange for so much pleasure;
then returning to his palace, he gave the doll to his wife. No sooner did she place it in her bosom to play with it than it appeared as Cupid in the form of
Ascanius before Dido, and lit a fire in her heart, and great desire to hear stories and tales, so that
at last, fearing to lose her life on account of her great longing, and to give birth to a manchild
who would corrupt a shipful of beggars, she sent for her husband, and said to him, 'If thou wilt
not call folk to tell me stories, I will punish my belly and murder little George.' Thaddeus,
desiring to get rid of this March nuisance, gave orders to the crier to publish that all the women
of the city should come to the palace on such a day, and on the appointed day, at the shooting
forth of the star Diana, which forerunneth the dawn to prepare the way by which the sun must
pass, they should meet all at the same place. But the prince, unaccustomed to see such a crowd,
and having no particular taste for the whims of his wife now that she longed to see so many folk
around her, chose only ten of the noblest in the city, who seemed to him the more provoking and
full of talk. And there were limping Zeza, crooked Cecca, wen-necked Meneca, long-nosed
Tolla, hunchbacked Popa, flabbering Antonella, musty Ciulla, cheekless Paola, hairless
Ciommetella, and rough-hewn Giacova; and, having written their names on a paper, he
discharged the others. Then they arose with the slave from under the dais, and all fared slowly to the palace garden,
where the trees and boughs were so well interlaced one with another that the sun's rays could not
penetrate underneath their leafy screen, and they seated themselves under a pavilion covered with
a creeping vine, amiddlemost of which played a fountain. Grand Master of the School of
Courtiers Prince Thaddeus thus began to say: 'There is nothing more pleasing and glorious in the
world, O my noble women, than to hearken to the deeds of others; and not without reason did
Aristoteles, that great philosopher, place man's greatest happiness in listening to pretty stories,
since in hearkening to them care and gloom vanish, and life is lengthened. And with this desire
doth the artisan leave his workshop, the merchant his traffic, the doctor his patient, the druggist
his business; and they all go abroad in search of those clever story-tellers, whose tales can rival
the best gazette written. By which reason I must excuse my wife, who, having become of a
melancholic mood, desireth so much to listen to some pleasant tale: and therefore, if ye are
willing to fulfil her wants and to catch mid-air also my desire, ye will be pleased in these four or
five days that ye will remain to empty your stomachs and recount every day a story, such as those
old women tell for the entertainment of the children, meeting always in this same site, where,
after having eaten, ye will begin by recounting, and will end the day by reciting an eclogue, and
thus we will spend joyously our life, and all the worse for him who dieth.' Hearing these words,
all bowed their heads downwards in humble assent to Thaddeus's command. In the meanwhile the tables were spread, and food was laid upon them, and they all began to eat;
and having ended,the prince made a sign to Zeza the limping that she should open the fire. Rising
and bowing low to the prince and his wife, Zeza thus began her say: |
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Publishers' Note Introduction First Day
Second Day
Third Day
Fourth Day
Fifth Day
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